The Most Honest Prayer You Didn’t Know You Were Praying
I know it might be a bit out there, but let’s talk about Sabrina Carpenter.
Just bear with me a second here. What you actually think of her or her music doesn’t matter much here. That is not what we are debating.
I’ve spent the last week stuck in bed with a bad back (don’t ask), and needless to say, that led to quite a bit of TikTok scrolling. Don’t judge me; there are only so many books one can read when lying flat.
This rabbit hole meant I ended up catching the full launch of Sabrina’s new song, Manchild. It’s boppy, clever, a full-on female anthem. I like the vibe, and honestly, Sabrina is one of the best at branding right now.
Somewhere around the 111th time I heard it, something unexpected dawned on me:
This song is a prayer.
Not a conventional one, not the kind you’d say in church or write in a journal, but one of those very human, very messy, very real prayers. The kind we cry into our pillow.
It starts the way many of our internal conversations with God start: with blame. Frustration. A sense of Why is this happening to me? Why do I keep ending up here? Why do these people keep walking into my life? There’s a lyric where she sings:
“I swear they choose me, I’m not choosing them!”
And wow , haven’t we all felt that at some point?
Then comes the line:
“Amen…”
followed by a pause.
And then:
“Hey, men.”
It stopped me in my tracks.
Because doesn’t that say it all? The solemn Amen, the moment of conviction, of honesty, and then the cycle starts again. She turns her head before the ink is even dry on the promise. We’ve all done it.
We beg God for help, we make deals, we cry out “I’ll never do this again” and then we walk straight back into the very thing we just prayed to escape. Not because we’re foolish. But because we’re human. Because change is hard. Because temptation often looks like comfort.
This song is a mirror. Not just for anyone who’s picked the wrong partner (though that’s the surface story), but for anyone who’s tried to break a cycle and felt themselves pulled back in. Anyone who’s felt stuck between what hurts and what’s familiar. Anyone who’s said Amen and then, maybe even the same day, said Hey, men.
If that’s you, you’re not alone.
If you’re trying to walk away from something you know isn’t good for you , a relationship, a habit, a thought pattern, a way of life this song might sound uncomfortably familiar. And if you’ve failed before, that doesn’t mean you’re not still growing.
Life is messy, we do things we know we shouldn’t and we often stray form our path ( Lead me Not Into Temptation). But don’t stop. God is still their listening ready to help life and carry this burden.
A Prayer for the Ones Still Going Back
Dear God,
I keep going back to things that break me.
I don’t always know why,
and sometimes I feel like I can’t stop.
But deep down, I want something better.
Help me see clearly.
Help me want wholeness more than I want what’s familiar.
Help me believe I’m worth saving, even from myself.
I don’t need everything fixed today.
But please show me one step forward.
Even a small one.
And if I go back again,
don’t give up on me.
I’m still reaching for the light.
Amen.
This article was written by Sarah Newton and reflects her opinion on this matter. Other opinions within the church and the wider Church of England may differ.
